Being a parent has never been an easy job, but helping a child with executive functioning weaknesses can be even more stressful. Mothers and fathers set up systems to organize folders, binders and backpacks and then see their student getting in the car with crumbled papers everywhere. Careful structures are set in place for accomplishing homework and long term projects and then hours can be wasted on a teenage meltdown, an “important” phone call or a shopping emergency. Many of the parents I see complain that they hate feeling like they’re constantly nagging, especially when they can’t be with their child every hour of the day. When work schedules and other family members need attention as well, it can seem like most interactions with the disorganized child become a litany of “Did you do…?” It can be very frustrating for both parties.

However, take a deep breath and pat yourself on the back. Continual, consistent reinforcement is the only way to make permanent improvements in executive functions. No system is perfect and there will always be challenges to the daily schedule, but setting plans in place and trying to stick with them teaches your child that organizing time, material and thoughts are key to achieving objectives, whether personal, academic or career goals.

So when you feel like a harassing harridan, remember, you are doing what you are supposed to be doing to keep your student on track. Calm, persistent insistence on taking the necessary steps towards success will lead to times that you can take a break and celebrate accomplishment. And one day, surely your child will thank you for your gentle guidance in helping him reach his goals.